Wellness Center

We’ve been having great conversations in wellness about stress– the pros and cons; how to manage it; and what the physiology of stress is. Sometimes students are overwhelmed by their stress and other times, we see them keeping it in perspective and using it as a tool to propel them to the finish line. In the center, we’re really busy triaging stress in ways that parents can use at home. Letting students vent about their stress and unplug from it in healthy ways is key!

One of the concepts that has really resonated is “rest and digest” learning. Cramming for hours on end and pulling all-nighters don’t work– they actually keep our nervous systems in fight-flight mode. Learning embeds when it rests so a good night’s sleep as well as appropriately-timed and managed breaks from studying will help the learning sink in. Wellness will be open for drop-ins before and in-between finals. We’ll provide friendly support, guided awareness of breath meditations, and stress-relieving activities. Use the parenting opportunity to be the cheerleader your student needs– they got this!

Beware of “anxiety avalanche”! With finals coming, many students are experiencing “catastrophic thinking.” When we’re overwhelmed with work, the worrying mind takes over and gets in the way of productivity, mood, and overall wellness. Recognize the spiral, and then intervene. Start by asking your kids if they can identify the root problem which is the source of the cascade. Maybe it’s a particular class, grade, or friend problem. Or maybe it’s a destructive self-judgment thought, like “I’m not good at school.” Once they name the root, you can encourage them to apply logic. Can they prove their thought is true? You can also encourage mindfulness practices– switch from thinking mode to SENSING mode; recognize needs and resulting emotions; practice self-kindness. For more on catastrophic thinking, click here. Finally, and probably most importantly, know that top-reported student needs are space, understanding, and no additional pressure! 

Whether it’s about academics, relationships, sports or extracurricular activities, even the most routine student conversations reveal the power and influence of the adolescent inner-critic. The voice that tells us we’re not good enough is destructive and inhibitory but it is possible to change its tone. Practicing self-compassion has so many evidence-based benefits from increasing your compassion for others and enhancing motivation, to reducing your output of the stress hormone, cortisol. How to practice self-compassion isn’t complicated: treat yourself the way you would treat a cherished friend. How self-compassionate are you? Remember that kids model themselves after us. This link to a self-compassion test from Dr. Kristin Neff will show you how you’re doing at being self-compassionate. You’ll find lots of resources on her site for learning more and beginning your practice.

I am thrilled to be working with the Acalanes Unified High School District (AUHSD) this year!

I am currently attending St. Mary’s College where I have successfully obtained my School Counseling credential, and am now finishing the Marriage, Family Therapy portion of my Masters in Counseling. I have been in the education field for about 10 years, beginning as a teacher and now moving into a more therapeutic space with students. When I’m not at work, I’m spending time with my family and friends, traveling around the world, or relaxing with a great book or movie.

I believe we all have a story to tell, that our experiences and relationships impact who we are, and that sometimes we fall off our paths and need support to see the way. I look forward to giving my all and working with the AUHSD community this year!

High school is an important, and hectic, time in an adolescent’s life.

With all the academics, social and extra-curricular activities they engage in, they hold many identities. Think about your student. What do they do? Are they academically-oriented? Athletic? Artistic? Creative? Politically engaged or social action oriented? Talented at gaming? It is important to recognize these other identities, because solely holding the identity of a “student” can be very stressful. Having a narrow view on the identity of a student can make a low test score, bad quiz, or missing assignment devastating.

Celebrate all of your student’s talents and abilities through the ups and downs of adolescent life and they’ll feel supported as a whole person. (CS 9/17)

From Matthew Gahagan, Wellness Counselor Trainee

We’ve been doing a little “listening campaign” in wellness to understand what adolescents most need from parents and the other adults in their lives. We didn’t expect the answers to be so similar and resounding. In a word, they want the thing we all want, active listening.

The features of active listening include: open curiosity; non-judgment; feedback to reflect understanding; questioning whether the speaker would like advice. We all know how it feels when the person we’re speaking with is waiting their turn to speak instead of really listening. We’re a bit less aware when we’re the ones listening without curiosity and when we’re directing the conversation toward our own agenda.

Try a little exercise with a friend of family member where you each take two minutes to answer a prompt (try “what’s in your heart?” or “what’s really been on your mind lately?”) No interruptions, no feedback. See how it feels and you’ll have a great sense for how you can immediately improve how you’re supporting your teen.

Allen Choi, Wellness Coordinator (ext. 7150)
Casey Sasner, Intake Specialist (ext. 7136)

While it may not be the first stress-reducing strategy to come to mind, connecting with others is easily one of the most effective and available. This is one of the reasons why students set their devices aside when they’re in the center and believe it or not, they’re happy they did. Time and time again, we see students who are overwhelmed connect with us and then turn around and connect with a peer in need. It feels good to talk it out; to learn that many of our experiences are universal; and to both give and receive words of compassion. Next time you’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed, do a scan of your emotions and notice where you feel them in your body. After you connect with a compassionate listener who you can count on to be supportive, scan again with close attention to your experience. If you can identify the feeling of a lowered stress response, share that with your kids and see if together, you can create a new habit!  (CS 8/29)

Change can be difficult – even positive life transitions cause stress.  As the new Wellness Coordinator I am thankful I get to pursue my life mission helping kids overcome obstacles that may impede them from leading joyful lives. Along with this positive development, I have encountered stress. To counteract this, I acknowledge the transition and become intentional about finding peace: walking to get ice cream, zoning out to 90’s R&B, and feeling the wind as I bike ride. Our students, too, are in a transition from enjoying more carefree summers to managing alarm clocks, class schedules, and homework while navigating complex social structures. These transitional stressors are added on top of existing concerns. Let’s help our kids out during this difficult transitional period by encouraging them to incorporate some fun or relaxation in their lives. A few minutes of enjoyment and peace can go a long way toward recharging, being happy, and being better students.  

Allen Choi, Wellness Coordinator (ext. 7150)
Casey Sasner, Intake Specialist (ext. 7136)